Tom, down in the dumps?
that there, all warty and lumps?
my long-jumping buddy, Uncle Bumps.
the ONLY cure for the hangdog blues, Uncle Bumps repositions the
shoulders (yours) for a comfortable ride (his), and hops aboard.
he is not to be outdone in the post-to-post pass, and spirals with
the best of them over the covers and through the woods. Familiar
with the humors and mood of females as well, Uncle Bumps is equally
comfortable having secrets whispered into his anatomically correct
toad ears and having ribbons of joy draped over his batiked body.